road trip....

We are getting ready to take a road trip so Darin can take test at different police departments in different states. We are also going to see his family. It should be a fun trip all in all but leaving Shadow and Spooky has me a bit nervous. I have not been away from them for more then a week. I'm sure they will be fine with my mom but I am still going to miss them like crazy! I would love to take Shadow and Spooky with us but I know they hate being in the car. Since it is getting warmer we are going to have Shadow groomed again. He looks so freaking cute when his fur is cut.

Pregnancy news: Tomorrow will mark 11 weeks pregnant. The morning sickness is starting to get better but my head seems to hurt all the time. My mood swings are getting worse and I am crying a bit more. I cant even put into words how scary it is to be pregnant after having 2 miscarriages. I want this little bean to stick and be the baby we get to hold in our arms after all these years of trying. I feel so lonely sometimes. Alot of my infertile friends wont talk to me anymore and I understand why it just sucks. I know they are happy for me but me being pregnant is a reminder they are not. I have been there and I get it. Its funny how such a happy time in your life can make people act kind of mean. I don't post much on facebook about my pregnancy because I know it bothers some people. I got a not so nice email telling me my baby could die at any minute and I should not be so excited. Don't you think I know that???? I need to make myself be excited because if this baby does make I want to be able to tell him how happy I was not how afraid I was. I need to be strong and don't need a reminder from someone I hardly talk to.

saying goodbye

After 5 years and 2 months I had to say goodbye to my car. It was the first and only car I bought myself. We had some good times and some shitty breakdowns. I sold my care a couple days ago and I have to admit I do miss it. In the long run it was the best thing for our family. Maybe in a few months we will sell Darin's truck and get an SUV or we will just wait till we need a second car and go from there. It was hard having to say goodbye to all the good times but I will always have the memories.