i wrote this on July 21st i am posting it now because we finally have internet

My sweet little pumpkin is napping and I finally have a minute to sit down and write a blog. I am sitting here listening to the rain, feeling the breeze, just taking a minute to catch my breath. Life is hectic with a toddler. There is always something going on or something that needs to be done. I would not trade a moment of it for anything. I love my life today more then ever before. I have an amazing husband and an amazing son. We are happy and healthy and could not ask for more. Moving to North Carolina is one of the best decisions we have made. It is so peaceful here. It is hard having Darin gone all the time but it will all be worth it in the end. He is having a great time, learning a whole bunch, and doing the very best he can. He has done really good on all the tests they have had so far and he has lost over 12 pounds and over 10 inches since the class started. It may be long hours but it is an amazing experience for him. Aidan is 21 months old today. Only 3 months until he is 2 years old. I can not even believe it. It truly is a dream come true!

new facebook page Mommy life

Mommy life My blog posts are so few and far between now. I am sorry about that. We have not gotten internet wince we moved, we just use our phones. Aidan is getting older and doesn’t give me much time to get on the computer. Anytime I do get on the computer he wants to “help” and it makes it impossible to do much. I started a page on facebook called Mommy life I update my page regularly and I am also posting on instagram (Brianna_marie_e) This blog started as a way to keep friends and family in the loop as we moved from Nevada to North Dakota back in 2009. It quickly turned into blogs about infertility and miscarriages. I found tons of help and friends through blogs and wanted my blog to help other people. I love that I was able to be there for people in their time of need like so many bloggers were there for me. My infertility blog turned into a pregnancy blog then a mommy blog. I am so grateful that I was able to have a child after years of infertility. I look at him everyday and know how very lucky I am. My life could be a lot different right now. I could still be whishing, waiting, wanting a child. I am so glad to be where I am today. Infertility and the miscarriages still have a huge impact on my life. I am the mommy I am today because of that struggle. I love Aidan so deeply and would give anything for him. I practice attachment parenting because I can not imagine parenting any other way. I follow his cues and respect him as a person. I will not yell at him, I will not hit him, and he will NEVER be left to cry alone. I will ALWAYS be there for him. I wish I was able to be there to Weylin and Holly as well. Having a child after struggling with infertility is amazing. I feel as though it has helped me be a better parent because I know what it is like to want a child but not be able to have one. I will continue to update the blog when I can and you guys can (and do) find me on facebook. Thank you for all the support and please remember that dreams do come true!

moving update

Well it is official we now live in the great state of North Carolina. Aidan did so well in the car on the road trip here. It only took us five days to get from Nevada to North Carolina. It was not super easy once we got here but we finally found a great place to rent. There is tons of space and we were able to get a king size bed! We are having a great time here and loving all the fresh fruits and vegetables. Farmers Markets are truly amazing! Aidan is a year and a half old now and time is just flying by. He is getting back into his own routine and seems to be transitioning well. He got to meet two of his cousins that are around the same age and he did so good. He is the sweetest little boy I have ever met. One of his cousins was crying and he went up to her and started rubbing her back. Moments like that show me that we are making the right parenting decisions for our family. Aidan is also become more and more of a dear devil these days. There is nothing he will not try to climb and he is not trying to jump off of the bed. This move may not have gone according to plan but I can already tell it was the best thing for our little family!

life update and Aidan is 16 months old!!

I have become increasingly crappy about updating my blog. So much is going on and every time I think to write a blog I get distracted. We are still moving to North Carolina sometime in April. I am trying to pack but as of right now I think I have packed all that I can in advance. The exact dates of the move are still up in the air and Darin still needs to make a trip to North Carolina in March. The dates on that are still unknown as well. This will be our most last minute move ever. Even though we have known we are moving for a few months we will not have a final leave date until probably a week or so before we go. Aidan is 16 months old today! He is such an amazing little boy. He is talking more and running every where. He is still breastfeeding on demand and eating pretty much everything we eat. We had fish a couple weeks ago, I am not crazy about fish and didn’t think Aidan would like it but he seemed to enjoy it. He also seems to like mushrooms but they do not seem to agree with his stomach. He is trying to climb anything and everything he can. He is giving “high fives” sometimes and is now waving at everyone he sees. He is still signing “milk” when he wants to nurse. He will point and yell at things to let us know he wants them. He is still rear facing in his car seat and will be for years to come. Aidan will point to his nose, belly, head, mouth, ears, and penis when asked. It is pretty cute. If he sees your belly he immediately attacks your belly button. He has also been giving “Eskimo kisses” almost every time I ask. It amazes me how smart he is. He has a set of different color balls and if we say “get the blue ball” he will get the blue ball almost every time. We are working on the animals and their sounds now. Darin can still make Aidan laugh with the smallest things but I have to work a bit harder to get a laugh out of him. Aidan is such a great toddler! Every day with him is an adventure and I would not change it for the world. We are such a lucky family. Darin and I are so grateful to have each other. We work hard to make our lives what we want them to be. I love being married to my best friend. We have been through some hard times but I like to think we came out the other side stronger than ever. I still think of Weylin and Holly but the pain of the loss is so much easier to handle now. Instead of a stinging pain in my heart they are a great reminder of how strong I am. I have lost two children but I am still here. I was finally able to carry a baby to term and sustain his life with my breast milk. My body is no longer a failure. My body is finally doing what it was made to do and I am proud! Life is amazing right now and I am so grateful for that! I am glad we have decided not to have more children. I do not ever want to try to have a baby again. My infertility journey ended the day Aidan was born and I want to leave it that way. I do not want to be sad every month and I do not want to something that I can not have anymore. Now that my journey is over I can look back and be grateful for the experience but the pain of infertility is still with me. I do not want to start again. I am happy with life right now and I want to give Aidan all of my love and attention. He deserves to be loved and cared for with out interference. Darin and I both have sisters and hate it. We are the oldest and were treated like crap. Our sisters are the babies of the families so they were babied. The grass is always greener on the side I guess. I am sure some only children hated it and some people with siblings love it. Between the infertility and miscarriages I just can not bring myself to try to have a baby when I already have one. I got what I wanted and do not want to be greedy.

sorry it has been so long!

We have been so busy! Aidan is doing great and growing so fast! We are moving in a few months. We will be starting a new adventure and I am pretty excited. Right now we are cleaning out the house and packing. We are giving tons of stuff to my sister so we will not have to move with much. I'll try to update more often. Follow me on instagram at Brianna_marie_e