11 months...(a day late)

I have been thinking and thinking about what to write and nothing is coming to me. I miss my baby so much and I can not believe we are only one month away from a year. I should have an almost 5 month old baby but I don't. I didn't get to have newborn pictures done, I didn't get to hold my baby, I cant see my baby smile, or hear him laugh. I sit here with empty arms thinking of what could have been. Emotionally today is a million times better then it was the day we lost the baby. I felt so weak the day we lost the baby, so empty, so sad, and millions of other things, today I can proudly say I feel strong! I feel like no matter what happens I can make it through! I love my husband and I love both of the babies that we lost! I will never hold them or hear them laugh but I will always know them!